Wednesday, February 16, 2011

I don't have a good title for this one?

So today started out kind of rough. My alarm clock rang at 6:00am. I have to be to work at 8, takes me a solid half hour to get there. I literally hit the snooze every 5 minutes until 7am. This is no joke. I mean that is just so stupid! Why not just get up instead of sleep in 5 minute increments. Long story short, I threw a braid in my hair and could not decide what to wear and ended up putting on these brown leggings and a brown dress- that absolutely did not match, with some camel colored flats for shoes. If I were authoring a fashion blog- I would clearly not have many followers because it was just embarrassing. Anyways, I got over that real quick when I walked into pure stress on the job. It seems like the last 2 weeks have been purely brutal. I always try to go into work with a good attitude. I never make it through the day with one though. I'm not bashing my job, or the company that I am employed by. I simply do not feel one ounce of joy or fulfillment in what I am doing. I think that is important when you spend the majority of your life at this thing called a job. For the moment, I am enduring and being encouraged to hang in there and glorify God while trying to make the best of a not so ideal situation. I am decent at what I do, I make a rookie mistake every now and then but for the most part it's not so tough- it's just stress. So, my prayer is that the Lord would sustain me here and help me to walk out each day with the power of the Holy Spirit and be grateful for the money and benefits I receive in turn for the job I do. I know we all struggle with finding that job that is just right for you- it's tough- to know what you want to do and how you want to spend the majority of your time. I guess I was just under the impression that I would get "the job" and as many of us who just graduated college find out... it's not that simple.

I did drive by this teeny tiny little hair salon while I was picking up dinner for Josh and I. I stopped and stared at it for a moment. Dreamed for a second. It was so cute and chic. I do hope the Lord allows me to be a business owner. I think the idea of having something to call your own, to put your heart and soul into, and to be so full of love for would be incredible. I'd really love that. I believe that everything that we do is to prepare us for something to come. I have no idea what my current job is preparing me for, but... man I'm going to be ready.

It was so nice today in TX I was dreaming about a nice long run all day long. I literally circled the outside of my building three times today just to get some fresh air. Once I was released from my desk...rrr... I got in my car and the minute I got home I put my new running shoes on! I felt great today. I ran for 20 minutes straight- the weather was perfect. The only thing that is kind of stinky is there are so many cars and people out it's hard to find peace like I'm used to while running. Hopefully Josh and I make it down to Town Lake to run soon by the water! On Sunday we run a 5K downtown, which will be our kickoff running event for the year! I'm really excited (for our free shirt ;)).

We had small group tonight. It was just 4 of us, and it was great. I felt like our discussion was very meaningful and we got to really dig deep into some pretty serious questions and ideas about God. It was cool. Robby and Crystal, Josh and I talked a lot of the sovereignty of God and human responsibility- how God sent Jesus to re-unite us (reconcile) with and to him. It's an awesome thing once you really understand it. This led to the discussion of the power of the Holy Spirit. We all want it and want to see it work, but are so comfortable in the "norm" that we don't trust in the Holy Spirits power to do so. I'm very encouraged to call upon the Holy Spirit and to really pray that God would use me and speak to me. I miss the setting where at any time, friends and I could just pray- just stop and pray over each other. My desire is to get back to that here- to be BOLD in the name of Jesus.

I think I'll start now by getting on my knees and praying.


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